It was a good thing I had a drink or two, I think, because I spent a lot of the session really nervous about whether or not I would look extra-chunky in the finished pictures. While a lot of the time, I can look in the mirror and be happy with what I see, I really hate the way I photograph. I have a lot of bad angles, you know - pretty much everything that isn't a straight up Myspace photo shot from above - so I worried about almost every pose. A profile shot? Ugh, better suck in the stomach. Craning my head up to kiss Mr. M? Might as well just shine a spotlight on my double chin!
While I've lost thirty pounds since our engagement, and I'm much happier about the way I fit into clothes and how much healthier I feel, taking our engagement pictures made me realize that I need to step it up on a couple of fronts before the wedding. First, I should probably stay the course with my weight loss program. With eight months to go before the big day, I can probably shed another thirty pounds - and hopefully, that will make me a little more confident about my body in general.
Second, though, I think it's important for me to get to a place of peace with my body. Sure, I've got a tummy and a pair of flabby arms and chubby cheeks that get extra chubby when I grin wide - but I've also got a fiance who loves me just the way I am and tells me I'm beautiful every day. That doesn't mean I don't need to continue to strive to be as healthy as possible - for myself, for Mr. M and for our future little M's - but I also need to stop obsessing about my imperfections. I can't help where the camera focuses, but I can control where I focus - on the love pouring out of Mr. M's gorgeous face, the tender way we hold each other, the beauty that he sees in me.
This is a beautiful post, and I not only think that Mr. M thinks you're beautiful on your wedding day but that on your wedding day everyone is going to see that grin, NOT the flab or tummy: you are going to be a gorgeous, beautiful bride and that's what your wedding pictures are going to show, and your e-pics are going to show how blissfully in love you are! That being said, getting healthy is always a good thing, so best of luck on your weightloss program!!
ReplyDeleteAww, thank you! I just got the pictures in, and while there are some I'm not wild about, I'm doing a pretty good job of focusing on the positive. :) We really do look lovey and happy in them!
DeleteI love this, especially making peace with the body. It's so true for all of us women (I think). While I'm sure you look great in the photos, I'm thinking the love you and Mr. M share are what's going to make them magic :)
ReplyDeleteIt's definitely all about the love! And while I can definitely pick out my own flaws in the finished product, it's also really easy to see the beauty that's there because of that love. :)
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