Love is a decision

This weekend, Mr. M and I attended our long-awaited (and long-dreaded) Catholic Engaged Encounter retreat. Long story short: it was amazing.

There were some parts we weren't crazy about, of course, like the creaky beds in our monastic cells or the stale croissants at breakfast. (Luckily, there was a McDonald's across the street! When we pulled into the parking lot of the retreat center and spied the Golden Arches, the knowing look that Mr. M and I gave each other was proof positive that we're a hundred percent perfect for each other.) But the weekend's bright spots eclipsed the not-so-hot ones by far. Some of the bonding we did was over silly stuff - like sneaking out for breakfast at 6:30 a.m. before anyone else was awake, or Mr. M crawling out onto the balcony to let me into my room after I accidentally locked myself out of it. But most of it was real, honest, emotional re-connection.

Living it up, monk style!

Our fellow fiances and fiancees were a smart, honest, fun group of people. Though most of the work we did was just with our own intended, there was a group session on Saturday night where we all sat around in a circle and discussed relationship issues that we'd written down and stuffed in the anonymous questions box earlier in the day. There was a really broad range of experience in the group, and it was really cool to hear other folks' thoughts on some things that come up in a lot of marriages. The two older married couples who led the discussions throughout the weekend were also fantastic. They did a lot of very honest sharing about their lives together, and I really appreciated their willingness to open up and tell us about how they have worked to create successful, happy marriages.

I was nervous, before the weekend, that Mr. M and I would be put through some sort of Spanish Inquisition about our living arrangements or subjected to a lecture about burning in hell if we ever even thought about using contraceptives, but that kind of thing never really happened. There was a discussion about Natural Family Planning and a couple of mentions in the written materials about the supposed benefits of not living together before marriage, but the judgement I expected was nowhere to be found. (Phew!)

All in all, the time we spent there was worth every minute and every penny. We loved it so much that we signed up to volunteer to be one of the presenting married couples someday in the future! It was so lovely to take some time out from our daily lives and just share with each other. I couldn't recommend it more highly!