If a bride falls in the forest...

...but nobody's around to blog about it, did it really happen?

Earlier this week, I received the (breathlessly anticipated) response to my application to become a Weddingbee blogger. Survey says? Reee-jected. Cue the sad trombone!

I took it pretty hard - a lot harder than I thought I would. Going into the application process, I knew that it was seriously competitive, and the chances of being accepted were pretty slim. But still, reading that email? I was crushed. The intensity of my disappointment was really surprising for me, and I decided it was time to take a step back and do some serious thinking about what wedding planning - and blogging about wedding planning - really meant to me.

I think it all comes down to approval. Gaining the approval of my loved ones has been incredibly important to me when making wedding decisions. It's affected everything from picking my colors (navy blue dresses are flattering on everyone!) to choosing to have a Catholic ceremony. I nixed the idea of glittery shoes after an off-hand comment from a bridesmaid about how tacky it was to wear sparkles after the age of fifteen. I decided against a cake topper I loved after my mom told me that it wasn't elegant enough for our venue. Even buying the dress - sure, I liked it, but what really swayed me was the fact that everyone else LOVED it. And those ridiculous tulle ballgowns I tried on? Maybe they weren't terribly flattering... but they made me feel romantic and ethereal and... like a bride. But no one else liked them. So we kept looking.

Being chosen to blog for Weddingbee would have been the ultimate approval, I think, which is probably why I craved it so terribly. A bunch of strangers think your wedding looks awesome and they like your style? Well, then it must be pretty awesome! The proliferation of wedding blogs - and my personal addiction to them - complicates things as well. It's easy to feel like if something isn't documented, written up and shared with strangers, then maybe it just wasn't good enough... and if your wedding doesn't make women all around the country drool and re-pin your photos on Pinterest, then you've pretty much failed your wedding.

But we all know that's not true - plenty of awesome weddings get blogged and plenty of awesome weddings don't, and as long as I end the day married to Mr. M, I haven't failed a thing. After all, weddings are about love, right? And Mr. M will love me even if the favors look like crap, and my mom and dad will love me even if we serve pigs in blankets at the cocktail hour, and my friends will love me in all of my tacky, glitter-heeled glory.

And that love? It's better than anything. Even a ten page spread in Martha Stewart Weddings.